Getting to Know the Midwife

I already have a page on this website, About the Midwife, that gives everyone a little peek into who I am. But, at the request of a few people, this post will be a deeper dive into getting to know me. If I were inviting you for a cup of tea so that we could get to know one another, here is what I’d have to say about myself.

I was born in the deep south, in Louisiana. My mother was given scopolamine (and amnesiac that was commonly used decades ago, called ‘twilight sleep’) and a deep episiotomy. I was pulled out with forceps that left a gash on my head, and separated from my mother for hours, in the nursery, as that was their routine practice. This was the earliest story of birth that I heard, and my mother chose differently for her next child, as she was very unhappy with her first experience. Outside of hearing this story, I didn’t think much about birth and I didn’t know midwives were still around. I grew up in Southern California and I recall thinking I wanted to be a doctor when I was a young child because I wanted to help people. By the time I was a teenager, my plans had changed. I was enamored with language and planned on going to university to become a foreign language college professor. I was taking French in high school and in my junior year, I spent half of my year as a high school exchange student in the south of Russia. It was a transformative experience in my life and really changed my entire perspective on life. I loved the Russian language, culture, people, and food. When I came back to the states, my entire focus had shifted away from academia. As a child that had always been an over-achiever in school, this was a profound and very needed change. I felt a pull to the natural health world, and decided I wanted to attend an herbalist school in another state. When I moved there, I discovered it wasn’t a good fit for me, but I wasn’t lost on my path. To the contrary, God was guiding me to be exactly where I needed to be.

The first birth that I attended was that of my sister-in-law shortly after this. She was having her fourth baby and had a nurse-midwife in the hospital. Before this, midwifery and birth wasn’t on my radar at all. This birth was the event that made me hear the call to midwifery, and I also instinctually knew that homebirth was where I wanted to be. Very soon after this, I enrolled in midwifery school. I didn’t know how or when I’d be able to apprentice, as I was working full time in a health food store at the time. I got connected to the local midwifery community and began attending a local midwifery study group. About a year later, my husband and I moved back to California for a short spell before finally settling in Oregon. During this brief time in California , I was invited to my first homebirth. My co-worker was planning an unassisted homebirth and she asked me to come to be her labor support. It was an incredible and beautiful experience, witnessing her push out her first baby into her husband’s hands as she squatted in her living room. Soon after that, we moved to Oregon, and I became pregnant with my first child. I interviewed a few midwives but ultimately felt called to plan an unassisted birth myself. I went on to have a long two day labor, and worked very hard to bring my first born earthside, and out he did finally come! That was eighteen years ago and my little peanut baby who weighed 6lbs 6oz is now taller and stronger than me. This birth was another transformative experience in my life. I’d say that each of my children’s births were profound, but the first birth really changed me. Perhaps I will share each of their birth stories in future blog posts, if there is interest.

In 2008, after completing my training, I started my own midwifery practice. It has been an incredible journey and I still feel such joy doing this work, whether it is a full day of prenatal visits, a middle of the night call to a birth, or postpartum visits to check on a new mama/baby. Often it is said that midwives have a calling to midwifery. The lifestyle isn’t easy for many people and it certainly isn’t a cushy 9-5 job. I absolutely do feel that midwifery is a calling from God to do this work. It has taken me a number of years to learn how to balance midwifery with motherhood, but now that I have it down, it flows beautifully. I have a very supportive husband and helpful children who support their mother doing this work. For this, I am thankful. For each mother who chooses me to walk the path of her pregnancy and birth, I feel overwhelming gratitude.

Fundamentally, as a midwife, I believe that birth is a normal, physiological event and generally, birth unfolds best when we don’t interfere. I’ve witnessed physiologic birth again and again as a midwife, and those births have been my greatest teacher. When things do stray outside of normal and need some outside assistance, then I am there, willing and able to step in and do what needs to be done. But I don’t like to interfere unless there is truly a need to do so. This is a delicate balance in midwifery: knowing when to leave things alone and when to step in and take some action. Getting that balance right is my goal as a midwife. In addition, parental autonomy is very important to me. I give families information about the pros and cons of tests, procedures and situations that may arise, and they choose what is right for them. I believe that prenatal care is truly what the mother does, day after day of her pregnancy. Her diet, her sleep habits, stress- management, exercise, etc.…this is prenatal care! Prenatal visits with your midwife are really about relationship building. I like to spend a lot of time with mothers discussing their vision for the birth, so that I know what they are expecting and what they are wanting. We discuss the details of labor and birth, all the different variations that may arise, and how I can best support her. This is individualized care, which is at the heart of midwifery. I love getting to care for each baby, but I truly love the relationship building that happens prenatally with the family. It is my favorite part of midwifery. Well, I do also love that I get to witness such profoundly beautiful and special moments during the birth as well. It is an honor that I don’t take lightly.

I took a 6-year sabbatical from midwifery when my 3rd and 4th children were born. I needed that space to learn more mothering skills as my family grew. I did attend a few births in that time period, but not many. Looking back, it was like a big out-breath for me, a time for me to gather my resources and get my feet grounded. Then the call to midwifery came again. I had two repeat clients who contacted me, and I knew it was time to step back in to birth. That was four years ago and I am feeling more energized than ever to serve my community as their midwife.

(Myself with my two youngest children during a recent fun day playing in the snow.)

Do you have any questions about me? I’d love to answer them! Feel free to comment below or send me a message.